Lately

I haven't had much to write about, there's really nothing to say that hasn't already been said. It's nice that my life has stabilized somewhat but it makes for a very boring blog.

Wedding planning is coming along, I find myself annoyed that I have to waste time on things like picking flowers and cakes and music, and more annoyed that the wedding planner wants us to spend ridiculous amounts of money on such things that I know from experience no one remembers anyways. I care about my dress, having a great minister, having family there, a vacation to remember not only with the kids but on our honeymoon, eating amazing food, and all the other normal things we would invest in. When she asks me about flowers for a table centerpiece, all I think of is that it will be in the way of my family's faces at dinner. Cake? Why can't we pick one up from the grocery store? Why does a cake for 15 people have to cost over $200 minimum?? Something we will DIGEST AND NEVER SEE AGAIN. Decor? I just want soft candles and white lights and lanterns, $50 max. For Christ's sake, we will be overlooking the GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE, isn't that decor enough?

I just want to have a nice time with my family and marry the man of my dreams and get this party started. Having two places is old. Not sleeping together every night is old. Calling him my fiance is old. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad we took a year engagement to adjust everyone and ourselves to the idea, it just gives me time to put it all in perspective; and nothing matters except that he and I spend the rest of our lives together.