-2 strokes, not one. One of the brainstem, one of the cerebellum.
-Breathing tube and Gtube taken out, he is now breathing on his own.
-He is alert and totally irritated and angry. He can't speak well and doesn't understand that or why his body isn't working like it's supposed to.
-he's not sleeping more than 15 minutes at a time.
I'm beyond exhausted. This has been such a traumatic experience. My Dad is so young, he's only 53, he plays guitar in a band, he plays raquette ball every week, to see him looking like an old man who has no control of his body is well, nightmarish. I keep hitting the wall, climbing over it, then hitting another one. I've exhausted all of my coping mechanisms.
I am in a very angry phase. My brother tonight put it best for me: "I've decided I don't care about being a good person anymore, because look what it gets you...a brain tumor and strokes." I agree with that except in my case it gets you divorce and the father you idolize with a brain tumor and two strokes all in 6 months.
The one good thing I can say is that people in general have been amazing. Dad's name has been added to prayer lists all over the country, I even heard today that monks in Washington added his name to their chants. Total strangers have offered to bring food. Friends are texting me off ledges in the middle of the night. Mostly I attribute this to my father. He is an amazing, amazing person, loves everyone, and he deserves this sort of treatment.
My kids are on spring break so I'm taking a little break from the hospital, going up at night only. I have been there 18 hours a day since last Tuesday. I am starting to look at my kids and worry that they won't talk or be able to look straight ahead. I'm delusional. Must recharge.